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Dealing with Cultural Differences at the Bowling Alley

Posted by Stuart at 06:09 PM on November 05, 2006

Obviously, I live in a foreign culture. And as any westerner who has visited Thailand can tell you, Thai culture is often the direct opposite of western culture. Of course the superficial cultural differences are obvious: the language, the music, the movies, the lifestyle.

But some things are deeper and more hidden. I uncovered one of these differences today, and even though I was mildly aware of it before, I was still surprised when it happened and was even more surprised at my absolute inability to adapt to the new cultural situation.

It all happened at the bowling alley. Piyawat's family was taking part in a charity there. It was a competition of sorts, with trophys for the highest scores. The first cultural difference was realized when we were told to be there at 8:30, but actually didn't start until 10:00. The reason was given that traffic was bad and so we had to wait until everyone showed up.

I can deal with waiting. I was patting myself on the back for my new-found mai bpen rai patience that I have Thailand to thank for. Ok, so far so good.

But then I very quickly realized that this bowling "tournament" was nothing like I had ever seen. First of all, everyone only took one shot, instead of two per turn. Ok, no big deal there, I guess. But then I realized that there was a bowling alley employee working the computer at our lane. He would change the score after every roll of the ball. Here is how the scoring worked:

* If you knock down an even number of pins, you get a strike for that frame.

* If you knock down an odd number of pins, you get to count that number for the first roll, and get a spare for the second.

And then here is the kicker:

* If you get a gutter ball, that counts as FIVE PINS, plus you get a spare for the frame.

* If you get three strikes (i.e., an even number of pins) in a row, you get a plastic bag with fruit juice and cookies inside.

These rules go against any notion of competition I have ever known. Bowling was quickly changed from a game of skill into a game of luck (even or odd numbers of pins). And to make matters worse, sometimes you would only get 8 or 9 pins to aim at instead of 10. And many times, the attendent made mistakes and would give you a strike when you only "deserved" a spare!

Needless to say, I was beside myself. How can I compete? How can I prove my skill (or lack of)? And I am not even a good bowler, averaging around 100 per game. But I want to be graded on my skill and to compete with those around me. Who is better or worse? I don't really care, but I want to compete!

Piyawat saw my discontent and tried to explain to me that it was "just for fun". I replied back that my idea of fun was keeping score and trying to break 100 and trying to beat every other bowler in the room. Cut-throat, no-holds-barred competition is fun!

And sure enough, I looked around and saw that I was the only spoil-sport in the alley. The Thai adults around me literally squealed with joy when they were lucky enough to get "three strikes" and were awarded bags of juice and cookies. They were all having a wonderful time. (I did win the bag of goodies one time, by the way.)

And even more disconcerting was that I could not join them. I was so caught up in the notion of individual competition that I could not enjoy myself. It's embarrassing to say it, but it's true. I am even getting worked up again now just thinking about it. But towards the end I started getting in the spirit a bit. All I could do was to concentrate and do my best to get real strikes, and to not look at the score board, and to not count the number of pins before I bowled. And by doing that, I did have a little bit of fun before it was all over.

So even though I am a 100-point bowler, at least now I can report to the world that my new high score is 224. I think a 300 is within reach someday, as long as I am bowling in Bangkok!