What If I Never Moved to Thailand?

Chris asked me an interesting question in a comment on this site a while back. I was talking about how I just celebrated my 6th anniversary in Thailand. He asked: "Amazing how one decision opens a whole new series of doors and opportunities in life. Do you ever wonder where you would be in your life had you not chosen to move to Thailand?"

And my answer? Yes, I do think about that often. Although my life in the US was good in many ways, I think that moving to Thailand and living here for six years has made my life even fuller. I feel very lucky to have experienced the things that I have.

I think we can all look back at our lives and see crossroads where there were decisions that we made that impacted the rest of our lives. For me, choosing what university to go to as an 18-year old -- should I go to 250-year old, 1,500 student Washington and Lee, or 40,000-student Home of the Fighting Florida Gators -- was a huge decision that affected my life. There is no doubt that if I had gone to UF, my life would have turned out differently for many reasons.

Perhaps another big decision point was choosing what graduate school to attend. I chose NC State, perhaps partly for the wrong reasons, but it was there where I got my life back on track and put me on the path I am on today. The work I did there as a student a decade ago has a direct link to the work that I am doing today. If I had never made that decision, I wonder where I would be now. I have a feeling it would not be a better place.

And moving to Thailand was of course a life-altering event as well. I came here not knowing what I was getting myself into, and not understanding anything around me. Everything I saw was new: new food, new locations, new faces, new friends, new rules, new standards. It has taken a long time for the exotic to shift into the normal and, without me realizing it, I put down roots like I never had before.

So back to the question posed: Do I ever wonder where I would be if my life if I had not chosen to move to Thailand? I would probably still be in San Francisco as I was before. Eventually, the dot-com industry picked up after the bust and I would have found a job very similar to what I was doing before. I'm sure my job would have been well-paid and enjoyable, and I am sure that I would have been surrounded by fun, creative, interesting people both in and out of the office. I am sure that I would be enjoying the beautiful Northern California terrain, I'd be eating at fabulous restaurants and my wine cellar would be of monumental proportions by now.

But at the same time, there was something missing when my life was like that. I was restless, yearning for some freedom or some environment or some experience that I didn't yet have. I still don't know exactly what it was that I was looking for, but I seem to have found it here in Thailand.

And looking ahead, I wonder what decisions will be coming up. I like the idea of a crossroads in one's life, even though it is very scary when you don't have any idea what is actually down the road you are choosing. But perhaps there are more life-changing decisions still ahead of me? Who knows?